Moo-ha Blog

alright…i’m not saying you shouldn’t date anyone from the internet
but my experiences have definitely been traumatic.  actually, i
can’t really say i even dated this person cuz i never physically saw
her…well…i did and didn’t.  ok, hear me out…

so a few years back, my good buddy…let’s call him eric lo to protect his
identity…and i decided we were bored and started scouting Yahoo!
personals for hot internet girls.  we put in our search criterias
(asian, must like all the nerdy stuff we like, video games, local to us, and
be really hot)…and sure enough, a few profiles actually came
up!  we saw a picture of this one profile and our jaws dropped
when we saw that, not only was she hot, but she liked WARCRAFT and
COUNTERSTRIKE…OMG!  it was a dream come true…we were almost in
tears.  so eric and i wrote a joint introduction of our geekiness
and how we love warcraft and games and that we’re not actually gay even
though we wrote this message together (signed me and eric). 

so the next day…to our immense surprise, this girl, let’s call her
khloe…wrote us back!  we’re like WOW…she thinks we’re
cool!  it was a match made in heaven.  eric and i had a fist
fight (flipped a coin)  to figure who gets her…but i won and he went
home crying. 

anyways, khloe and i would write each other almost everyday for about a month
until one day, she tells me that she wants me to meet her little "dong
seng" (dong seng means sister in korean…it wasn’t really her
sister…just a very good friend who she says she treats like a little
sister.)  i said sure…and we had a nice 3-way chat on yahoo msgr…me, khloe
and her dong seng…let’s call her mandy.  so one day, i gathered
up the courage to ask khloe to meet in person…she said sure…and
invited mandy to come along.  as luck would have it, khloe
couldn’t make it…but mandy shows up.  she was this cute 18 yr
old korean girl…exactly as khloe described.  i was pretty bummed
that khloe didn’t show though but i had a nice time with mandy. 

so as time went on, i started chatting less and less with khloe and
more and more with mandy.  it seems khloe’s always pre-occupied
with something and mandy’s always available.  but mandy had a bf
already so i obviously wasn’t interested in her (plus she’s far too
young) and i wasn’t about to give up on a girl like khloe who loved
warcraft and counterstrike.

so 3 months go by…i’m getting pretty impatient…i’ve met mandy
several times but khloe always bails on me.  i buy her little
gifts (i give them to mandy to give to khloe)…write her
everyday…but can’t seem to get her to come out even once.  so i
start getting suspicious…could mandy and khloe be the SAME
person? hmm….but how is that possible?  i’ve
been on 3-way chat with them…i’ve heard mandy talk to khloe on the
phone…khloe even has a last name (taka) and she works at jd powers & associates! dude, it can’t be…it
just CAN’T!

so the next time i went out with mandy, i kinda hinted at my suspicions
that she and khloe are one and the same.  we went to dinner and
she puts on a sad face and says "i have something to tell you about why
khloe can’t come out with us…" and i was bracing myself for the
truth.  did she get in a car accident?  is she maimed?
is she a man??  of course, mandy recoils and just says
nevermind.  damn!!

so finally, i couldn’t take it anymore.  i needed to know…does
khloe exist or not.  so i called eric to help me think of some
ways
to find out.  he suggested calling up jd powers in westlake
village (where she supposedly works) and ask for khloe taka.
DUH!  why didnt i think of that earlier?? so i called but there
was nobody there by that name.
i asked the receptionist to make sure and she says "look…i’ve been
here 20 yrs and there’s no khloe taka here!"

anyways…to make a long story short…one day, khloe *cough mandy* writes me
and says she’s going back to korea and will disappear from the face of
this earth.  (gee, what a surprise)  i stopped hanging out with mandy who was
trying to use me to get her bf jealous (he broke up with her later anyways…good for him)…and i realized that hot girls
who like warcraft and counterstrike do not exist in this world (and most importantly…dam that eric for losing the coin toss!)

This entry was posted on Friday, March 31st, 2006 at 2:16 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.